The world as we see it

“We don’t see the world as it is. We see the world as we are.” (Disputed origin) Anais Nin / Talmud

Everyone has their own perspective. That’s what makes the world so great. Everyone has the opportunity to find something they love in this world. I like when you share something you love with someone else, you create a connection with that person. I am all about creating connections with people. I enjoy it so much that sometimes I can’t see that there is any other way.

When I was in my twenties I had a roommate that I could connect with on various levels. However, I had a hard time understanding the way he saw the world when it came to some of his own experiences. For example, the company he worked for was going through layoffs one year and he was part of the layoffs. He had a plan. After being laid off, he moved his things back to his parent’s house and went backpacking through Europe. Before he left I had a talk with him about the experience he was planning. I couldn’t understand why he would want to backpack through Europe by himself. He would have no one with him to share his experience. I understand that people enjoy different things. I just couldn’t figure out why my good friend would prefer hiking through Europe by himself because it was such a foreign concept to me. I didn’t understand because I was seeing the world through my own eyes. My talk with him allowed me to see the world through his eyes. Although I can’t say I agreed with his approach, I understood that it worked for him even though it wouldn’t work for me.

I originally came across the quote above from a TED talks presentation by Kathryn Schulz. The presentation is called, “On being wrong.” Half way through her discussion, Kathryn starts in about people’s perspectives. Being wrong is all about perspective. Something is only wrong if it is wrong for you. Hence something that is wrong for you can be right for someone else. The presentation allows you to think about being (right or) wrong from a non-judgmental and non-traditional perspective. Also, being wrong allows you to grow. We learn more from being wrong than we do from being right. Feel free to watch a video of the presentation here: “On being wrong.”

So everyone has a different viewpoint or perspective. Do not judge, lest deny yourself the opportunity to really understand. We need to allow ourselves to judge less so that we may understand more. Really understanding someone can only be done when you can see the world through their eyes. The more you can see things through someone else’s eyes, the more you can understand. The more you understand, the more time you can spend being happy.

Coach Randal Suozzo, CPC, ELI-MP

Motivation

What motivates us? Dan Pink’s presentation on the subject is very interesting. He discusses a research study conducted by highly regarded economists that compares the size of a monetary reward to performance. They concluded that people perform physical tasks better as the monetary rewards increases. However, higher monetary rewards lead to lower performance as it relates to cognitive tasks.

This makes sense to me. Most people will physically work hard to gain a profit.  But when given a choice to mentally rise to the challenge, people would rather do so on their own terms. Providing a monetary reward can make it feel like your thoughts are for sale. It can feel like you are being manipulated. People want a sense of self. They want a sense of purpose. A sense of purpose provides fulfillment. People are motivated to perform cognitive tasks when they can connect it to a sense of mastery, autonomy, or a greater purpose.

Check out this very cool presentation… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6XAPnuFjJc

Coach Randal Suozzo, CPC, ELI-MP

The Moon at Dawn

I was driving along the Cape Cod highway last week and was in absolute awe of the moon sitting on the horizon before me. It looked full. Apparently I missed the full moon by one day. It was still magnificent. I am not normally driving this route to work, but that day I was certainly happy I was. The moon sat only a few feet above the horizon. As I drove towards it, with trees on both sides of me and no one in front of me (it was before 6 a.m.), it just held me in wonder. It was so big. (The moon looks the biggest when it is at its lowest point in the sky.) It was so beautiful. In that moment of beauty, nothing else in this world mattered.

Have you ever had a moment like that? It is a feeling of tranquility. A good friend of mine once told me about an exercise he had recently learned and asked me to try it. He told me to go outside when the sun is shining and spread my arms out wide. Then tilt my head back to the sky and see how I reacted. He said I would smile and it would be hard not to smile. It worked. I remember smiling. I remember feeling the smile start and the more I thought of it, the bigger that smile became. It felt like I was a little kid, a kid with a silly smile on my face for no reason at all.

I believe that this exercise only works for those who have the strength to let go completely. Let go of everything completely, for that one moment. Life is just a string of moments, all tied together. The more moments you can enjoy, the more you can enjoy life. If we can let go of all the stresses we carry, this can be one moment where we can smile. We can smile just because. And this moment will be won.

I seem to have the ability to let go of everything pretty easily so that I can enjoy more of my life’s moments. Moments as little as a setting moon at dawn. I get to have a moment every time I hear the words to a certain Snow Patrol song: “If I lay here. If I just lay here. Would you lie with me and just forget the world?” Forget the world. Enjoy more of your moments.

Coach Randal Suozzo, CPC, ELI-MP